vulnerability part 1

I've been trying to think of something to post since Tuesday. There are a few in-progress projects and such that I'm planning posts on, but I suppose I have to finish them first.

I've also been thinking some about what I posted earlier in the week, about blogging about my faith. (Thanks to those of you who posted encouraging comments - it really does mean a lot, probably more than you know.)

If I'm going to be honest (which is hard. really hard in this instance), I have to confess that my daily devotions are a bit lacking. And by lacking I mean pretty much nonexistent. I'm usually not sure how to pray or what to pray for, other than "God you're great, and God you're good..." before meals (but that's a post in and of itself). I often feel lost reading books that I don't identify with. And part of it is that I don't feel very comfortable talking about my faith, and I married a man who feels the same.

But I do want that to change, at least on my end. I guess these are my first baby steps toward that. So I am searching.

I've been researching different daily devotions and translations of the Bible. By this, I really mean e-mailing a few people and googling stuff - great information professional skills, I know. The last time I got a new Bible was in 2002. I was 16. That would be going on 10 years. Wow - I think it's time for a new one, a "fresh start" for my reading and thoughts, if you will. (That old Bible has a lot of marginalia and underlining, a lot of which doesn't exactly fall in line with my current beliefs. I was 16, after all. That's so young.)

Anyway, I just thought I'd share where I'm at right now. I don't know why, but pushing the "publish" button for this post is going to be tough. But I'll do it. Any thoughts or advice or encouragement would be fantastic. (Please be kind. I'm feeling vulnerable.)

Comments

  1. Country GirlJuly 23, 2011 at 8:16 AM

    It really is hard to be vulnerable! But I think most everyone struggles with doing daily devotions. I know that I do. I have a little Bible study book that I picked up by Kris Goertzen. She is a Pastor's wife from a Bible church in Hutch. It is titled Adorned with Humility. And I should have finished it long ago but am still going through it. But it has been great, really putting the focus on studying God's Word instead of what other people say about God's Word (If that makes sense) and putting passages down to read that I would not have thought of.
    And yes, It was really neat to run into you again! So very random!

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  2. jenb.July 24, 2011 at 1:34 AM

    I LOVE this post! It makes my heart happy for you that God has even put a desire on your heart to make change in your relationship with Him! That's EXCITING! I am currently reading, "one thousand gifts" by Ann Voskamp, and with that, I am watching the video blogs on the Incourage website, for their Bloom Book Club. I LOVE it. It is very simple, and the whole premise is how to START changing our lives by living in every moment looking for the gifts, the joy, and the blessings, that we are given. I have always been pulled to live this way - ya know, when I am in a rut, I realize I have lost my awareness to how blessed I am, and when I am on a high, I realize that I am in a relatively constant state of thanksgiving. When the road is steady, I find myself being very aware and intentional about looking for things to be thankful for. I hope that makes sense. By no means am I a pro, but it REALLY has shifted my focus in life quite permanently, and it is SO simple, and it grows SO amazingly! The book talks about recording the gifts, which is always a fabulous blog waiting to be written. :) No matter where you decide to start, I will pray that God will meet you where you are and grow you into the heart that He means for you to touch the world with! blessings... jen.

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  3. Ruth AyresJuly 25, 2011 at 8:27 PM

    I admire how genuine you are. It is scary to blog about the things that are so close to our bones. The things we can barely say to our closest friends sitting in the same room, and yet, we must write in order to make sense of it. Thank you for trusting us enough to share.

    One of my favorite places for devotions is Our Daily Bread. I like that it links directly to the Bible reading (and you can choose any version -- I usually use The Message). I like that it is short. I like that I can listen to it while I put my make up on if I'm running short on time. I especially like how much easier life is when I take a few minutes to follow through with devotions.

    Here is the link: http://odb.org/

    I'm there every morning usually via my iPhone, often before I even get out of bed.

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  4. KatyJuly 27, 2011 at 7:45 PM

    At least you're trying to focus more on your faith. While I go to church and all that jazz I just haven't felt very "churchy". Sadly, sometimes I could take or leave it.

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  5. KileyJuly 29, 2011 at 10:05 AM

    I find it hard to do devotions daily as well, but recently I found a devo book that I really like called The Message // Remix: Solo. It's mostly reading a short passage of scripture and then they have think, pray, live sections to help guide you meditation. I too struggle with knowing how to pray.

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